Three Men (and a cute little wienie dog)

Lady told this story today. My version is a bit different, so I put my part in ( ).
Three men ( and a cute little wienie dog) were on a trek when they came to a river. They needed to get to the other side, but the river was raging and roaring. The first man prayed to God, "God, please give me the strength to cross this river!" Poof! The man developed bulging muscles in his arms and bulging muscles in his legs. He dove into the river and swam across it in three hours. The second man prayed to God, "God, please give me the strength and the ability to cross this river!" Poof! The man developed bulging muscles in his arms, bulging muscles in his legs, and was given a rowboat, which he rowed across the river in two hours. The third man, having listened to the first two prayers, prayed to God, "God, please give me the strength, the ability, and the intelligence to cross this river!" Poof! The man turned into a woman! (The cute little wienie dog looked up at the woman and gave a pathetic little whine. "Awww," said the woman. "Do want to go across the river, too?" The cute little wienie dog wagged his happy meter and did the happy dance). The woman looked at the map and found the bridge, (scooped up the cute and smart little wienie dog) and walked across the river. (The cute little wienie dog thanked God for answering his prayer for a beautiful woman to carry him across the river!) THE END

The Messies

Good grief! Those little humans that come on Saturdays sure can make a mess! And they are not great about cleaning up! Nan and Christy stayed to help Lady. 

Okay, so maybe I stepped in their bead trays and dumped the beads out. They were in my way.

 I didn't make a bracelet. Some of the girls show their finished products. The others are still making a mess.  For snack we had chips and PB&J. I don't get the J.

PIZZA PARTY!

Nan's family came over for dinner tonight. Nan's dad wanted pizza, so Lady taught Nan how to make it. 

 

We had pizza, veggies and ranch dip, chips and salsa, hot and sour potato soup, and chocolate cake.

 

I had cheese pizza, chips, ranch dip and carrots, and a little bit of ice cream.

They sang songs, too.

 I had the best time playing tug-o-war with dead bunny and Nan's dad.

Her brother played with me, too.  Lady said I was as fat as a tic. We all went for a walk. Then, I was one pooped pup. Entertaining is hard work, but lots of fun.

HINDI LESSONS

Nan is now helping me improve my Hindi. Lady learns to speak Hindi, but I just learn comprehension. Although I understand Chinese, English, Korean , and Hindi, I only speak dog.

These are some phrases I'm working on:
1. Tire pe susu mutt karo - don't pee on the tire.
2. Tumme ek biskut chahiye? Do you want a cookie?
3. Yahan ao -come here
4. Oose yahan lao. Bring it here.
5. Marley kas hai. Marley is special
6. Sofe per na kooda. Don't jump on the sofa.
7. Aur nahi -no more.
8. Chelo -let's go.

Nan was eating some spicy chips. I wanted some. I like spicy. Lady gave me some of my treats. Well, they made me thirsty.

I drank Nan's water. It was conveniently located right next to me. Lady said it was rude of me, but I heard her laughing. Men kas hun!

Busted Again

I gotta learn to put the pillows back when I jump on the furniture. Lady always figures it out. Especially when I cry after she picks me up or puts me down...and when I first wake up. I am paying for my disobedience, I ache. It's been a bit chilly and damp so Lady thinks my arthritis may be hurting me, or I hurt myself jumping on the chair. She's letting me have the heater at night again, even though the electric bill that came today is high. Lady thought she could keep me off the sofas and chairs by putting all kinds of stuff on them when she left. Ha! I managed to get on the chair anyway! Ouch.
The neighborhood ladies came today. They were better behaved today than last week, praise the Lord, butt they made granola bars and took all of them! Nobody asked Lady or me if we wanted one -they just ate them (two pans full) and stuffed them in napkins, then went out the door. Lady got crumbs and dirty dishes. I didn't even get crumbs. Humans can be so thoughtless.

NO BEANS

Did you know that there are no beans in Beanie Babies? Instead, they contain PVC pellets. In 1998, TY company started using PE pellets instead. But neither are safe for dogs. So, if you are a shredder like me, your human needs to take out the pellets. Furriends, don't steal these toys with pellets in them and shred them. Be smart.

Lady performed surgery and took out the pelletS. She replaced them with some stuffing from my dead toys. Now, your human may also need to remove the eyeballs. I never eat the eyeballs. 

 Saturdays mean the neighborhood girls come over. Nan, Christy, and Tanya were here -my favorites!

 I got fussed at by the other girls for walking through their projects, so I hung out with Tanya. She never fusses at me. Maybe the girls should have paid more attention to Lady's lesson. They heard Esther's story. Lady gave them tips on how to act like a princess. Stuff like being kind, patient, helpful, minding your manners...I didn't pay much attention. I have my own tips:
1. Give the dog treats.
2. Scratch the dog.
3. Play games with the dog.
4. Give the dog treats.
5. Bring the dog toys.
Okay, so maybe my list is a bit different from Lady's. I bet Lorenza, Lily, and Nola know how to act like a princess. Maybe they will share their lists on their blogs!

Package Day!!

Now, if you have been reading my blog for any time at all, you know that I am an expert at opening any kind of package. Lady was gone when the package came, and the post man wouldn't let me sign for it. But, when Lady got back from her training, Padma's papa brought it to me. Thanks, Uncle Greg! You're pawesome! Uncle Greg and some friends spent an Easter with me in China.

 No trouble figuring out what's for me.

 Hot dog! My favorites!!

 Yum! Treats!

I can open this!

 A bag of Beanie Babies! Lady didn't see me get these. She was busy eating chocolate!

 Too late. One of these has got to be for me!

 I chose a turtle. Lady will take out the beans for me.

Uncle Greg, Aunt Jill and little humans, thanks for all the love! You just made our week!

BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION

Nan turns 18 today. She finished high school at the end of March and is waiting for her exam results. She wants to go to university to study computer engineering. Nan is trusting God to provide for her university fees as her mom and dad are in full-time ministry. She and her brother Vic (14) came by because Lady told them she had a cake and some western food for them. They were excited! Of course they were excited about seeing me. I helped Lady get ready. Lady made lasagna, garlic cheese biscuits, and chocolate cake. I cleaned up dropped cheese. I kept watch out on the balcony. The first cake she made fell apart, so she and Sonya ate it for breakfast. The second cake worked out okay. Lady made bacon cheese treats for me so I could join in on the celebration. I also got a plain cheese biscuit before the seasoned butter was painted on. I don't eat lasagna because it has things in it not good for little dogs.
Lady is happy when she cooks for others. Nan and Vic loved the food.That made us happy. 

 Keeping watch

 Do you have cows on your street? 

 Lady made treats for me

 Okay, we're ready for Nan- cake and dog treats!

I finished my basket. We had to use whatever fabric the ladies left behind. We used it for decoration.

 Nan and Vic liked their birthday lunch with me.

Happy Birthday, Nan!

FREE

In China, I could go shopping with Lady. As a matter of fact, I could even do my own shopping.  Sausages were conveniently located at a height I could reach. So were moon cakes during their season. The clerks just laughed and rang up the sale. But in India, I usually can't go with Lady. She doesn't have a car. The roads are too narrow and steep for a bicycle, so Lady walks, or I should say, climbs up and down flights of stairs to the small shops, and the one sizable grocery store/bakery. Sometimes she has to cross four roads, each meaning a steep set of stairs. I don't do stairs, so Lady would have to carry me. Kinda hard to carry groceries and me. But sometimes she's just picking up dahi, or bread, or something from the small shops on our lane. I can go there. To get what she needs, Lady has to go to a bunch of different shops. It's her exercise plan!
We don't have coupons here, but sometimes you get something for free when you buy something. Today Lady got two things free: a tiffin and a bottle of dish soap! The other day she got a free glass, ten American cheese slices, and six free Magi noodle packages. Lady made grilled cheese sandwiches for me.

Free tiffin and dish soap

Out of the Poop Pile

It can be the tiniest thing to turn a day around. Lady was sad this morning. I don't know why. The cold, gray morning didn't help. Yesterday I showed you my favorite poop place. Lots of street dogs and house dogs go there as well, not to mention the cows. Oh and I forgot to take a snap of the pot plants I pee on. Anyway, Lady spotted some snapdragons! One plant was pretty tall and flowering. She left that one and took some small plants struggling to find the sun from underneath a large plant. She cheered right up. Sometimes pretty things can come from poop. She took the little plants home to replant in a pot. When we returned later this evening, someone had pulled up the big plant.
The neighborhood ladies came over this morning and started working on finishing their baskets. What a mess they made! And I think if I heard them call Lady "m'am" one more time I would have just barked. Oh wait, I did. They all needed her help. And they were so rude this morning. They wouldn't listen to Lady's story. I really wanted to hear about Queen Esther. One woman even started singing a song about Krishna. Another lady shut her up, and they made it through the story.  And they stayed for hours! Didn't help Lady's mood much, but a couple of nice phone calls, some messages, and a Skype date did. And of course a few dozen licks in the face. Oh, and chocolate.
Lady's poopy morning produced some pretty flowers, and pup kisses.

 I needed a little help with my basket.

 The mess makers.

Another Monday

Well, it didn't rain yesterday after all, but today is rather gray. Thought I'd take some snaps on my walk to my favorite places to poop.

 I like to go run around in that little park but not until after I take care of business. Still, sometimes humans think I am going to poop so they fuss at Lady. Ha! And this in a country where the men always pee in public! Lady hates that. She always has to avert her eyes. But I'm a dog. We're supposed to go outside.

 See? Lots of good places to go.

 Who doesn't love a good dirt pile? But Lady won't let me go here on the fresh stuff because the workers are building a house with it.

This is the community center on my lane, host to many weddings and functions, site of many noisy firecrackers! I like to mark the poles.

This is the end of my lane before it curves  -it's a dead end. Cars have to turn around. It's a pretty nice view of the mountains, and a good spot for business.

The view

After my walk, I am ready for a morning nap on my very big bed with my very warm blankie.

WEEKEND

What a rainy, blustery, cold, gray Saturday! Christy hung out with us to help get ready for the neighborhood girls to come. I like looking out from the balcony on the parade of colorful umbrellas covering little humans. Only half the girls came yesterday as the others had a camping trip! Hope they didn't melt in the rain.  It isn't even monsoon.

 These are three of my favorites:Christy, Tanya, and Khushi. I'm going to invite them to my Gotcha Day next month. The girls painted sun catchers, thanks to some American friends who sent them! I didn't step in any paint. Lady gave me a shoe chew to keep me out of trouble. Ha!
Today, (Sunday), Lady went to church up on the Ridge, and hung around for the local celebration of State Day. 

This precious 6th grader is the daughter of local police officers. She helped Lady get a good seat, and talked her ear off. She also shared her snacks! After the parade and some cultural performances, Lady came back to me. 
More rain is forecast, but for now, lots of sunbeams for me!